Today is the 1st official day our house is on the market. It’s bitter sweet, I know it being on the market means that we are almost done with Residency but I can’t help being sad. We LOVE our house, from the moment we first walked in (it was still in the building process) we both fell in love. I’ve known we would have to sell but it always seem so far into the future not reality. Even last night when the sign was being put in the yard it didn’t hit me. This morning when I got up and check my email and our realtor had already emailed me about someone wanting to see the house, it HIT ME! It hasn’t made to realtor.com yet, it’s only been in the MLS since 4pm yesterday and someone wants to see it already!! Like, our realtor (who is also a friend of mine) said it’s a good sign. I found myself thinking they can’t see my house. This is the home we brought both of our children home to it has their nurseries. I spent hours working in their rooms. Alana first steps and words where in the house. Davis, crawled for the first time here, and at some point he will take his first steps. Our house means so much to us, the memories. We have a picture of John and I in the front courtyard the day we found out we where expecting Alana. Those are memories we will take with us forever. The sad truth is Alana and Davis won’t remember this house. Through pictures Alana might remember but even then I don’t think she will. There are so many things about this house we will miss. We have our close friends two doors down, it will be so sad to leave them. Just yesterday, the kids where playing and Owen (the Brown’s little boy) looked right at us and said, I love her meaning Alana. It was so sweet! They are going to miss each other so much. Alana thinks he is moving with us. She keeps telling him when we move to Portland, we can play with more of my toys, my mommy had to put them in storage. It will be one sad day in June when we drive away from this house. I will miss driving up the hill to the neighborhood, going down and Alana telling me we are on a roller coaster and putting her hands in the air! Camino Del Sol, it’s been a good 6 years we will miss you like crazy!
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Bitter Sweet!
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Back to Blogging!
It's been a few months since I last posted, busy life of a mother of two. Now, that Davis is getting older I’m hoping to have more time to blog. Since we are moving 2,000 miles away in 3 ½ months, I think it will help for family and friends to keep up with us.
We are doing great, preparing for our move to Portland, OR. Lots to do between now and June but it’s all coming together. I can’t believe we are in the final months of Residency. Time as gone so fast, it feels like it was just yesterday that John told me we where moving to El Paso for Residency. That was over 6 years ago! When I was a kid I would have given anything for time to go faster now as an adult I wish it would slow down some. Our kids are growing up fast. I love the stage of life we are in right now. I wish I could freeze time.
Like I said before, John is in his final months of Residency, you would think 4 years of under grad, 4 years of Medical School and 6 years of Residency would be enough schooling for him but not my John. He has 2 more years to go. He is going to fellowship in Pediatric Surgery! I sure hope he is done after that for a while!
Alana is just prefect! She is 4 going on 25, there is never a dull moment with her. I love being her mommy, she is an emotional train wreck most days, but they say that is Girl for you. She has taken to being the BIG sister like a duck to water. She loves Davis, always worried about him. If she isn’t wearing a princess crown then something is wrong. It’s a daily fashions statement in our house. I have to wear them at times only because she tells me every princess needs a Queen! She can’t wait to move to Portland. Over the last few months I have been putting things in storage Alana has been great about it. Telling me “Mommy, I will play with that again, it just needs to put up for people to buy our house”. I expected it to be a lot harder on her but she once again shows me how easy going with change she is.
Davis…. Oh my sweet baby boy!! He is 8 months old now, and gives me a run for my money daily. I have to watch him like a hock. He has thrown himself out of his high chair, turned the hot water on himself a few times, fallen off the bed a few times. If you set him down he will take off, he is crawling backwards and sideways. He can go front wards but realizes he can get there fast by rolling. The other day he got himself stuck in under my dresser. His favorite place is under my bed, he laughs when he gets under there. He is busy. He up to 17 pounds and doing great!!! For be a 33 weeker the kid has caught up, no delays at this point. We have been told that if there aren’t any developmental delays at this point he won’t have any. I sure hope he isn’t walking before we move, he can be delayed on walking mommy would be just fine with that.
I hope to blog more over the coming months.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Please Pray for Olive Hope
Rusty and Lynette Polinder have been working with the Akha Youth Development Center in Chiang Rai in Thailand as missionaries for the past couple of years and have been expecting their first child. Last Friday Lynette went into labor and gave birth to a baby girl 2.5 months premature. Olive Hope Polinder
This is a friends brother and sister-in-law they had their sweet baby girl Olive Hope at 28 weeks. As a mommy of a preemie I know their pain for first hand. I was lucky enough to carry both of my children closer to term than Lynette was. Being a preemie parent is the hardest things I have every done. Watching my children struggle in those first few weeks of life, is a pain I could NEVER explain. Watching a machine breath for them because their lungs are too weak. Only being able to touch my sweet baby's when I was told I could by a nurse. Not being able hold them because, they where to weak and sick. Is a pain no mother or father should ever go through. I have cried everyday for Lynette and Rusty. Even though I don't know them personally I feel close to them, I wish I could wrap my arms around both of them and hug them as tight as I could.
I found this prayer on Lynette sister blog, I thought it was a beautiful prayer and have been saying it myself all daylong. Please Pray for this Family. I know that prayer is what got John and I through Alana and Davis's NICU stays.
Carrie’s Prayer for Olive Hope
Olive Hope, The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.” (Zephaniah 3:17)
May the power and the blood of Jesus wash over your little body. Lord Jesus, I pray that you would surround Olive with the protective cushion of Your Spirit. I pray that you would wash healing all over her body, around her cells, through her organs, through her brain cells, renewing and restoring. Lord, restore the damage that has been happened with bleeding. Take it away and replace it with cells that are new, that are uninjured. Protect her body from bleeding – keep her cells tight and whole and immune to damage. Keep her from infection. Keep her vital signs stable. Protect her eyes. Protect her vision. I pray that her vision would be restored, and she will be able to look into the eyes of her mommy and see her. Wrap this little being in your presence, around and around with protection, comfort, and healing. Let the power of your kingdom be evident in her tiny body. Jesus. Mend Olive. Make her whole. Restore and protect her. Let her hear her mommy and daddy’s voice even when they are not with her. Let her rest and heal. Give Lynette and Rusty the strength and endurance they need. Give them words to pray, songs to sing. Hear the cries of our heart, Lord. Turn our tears into tears of rejoicing. Give Lynette and Rusty restorative sleep.
In the name of Jesus who died for us and brought us life and the light of your kingdom here on earth,
Amen.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Heavenly Days
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Bed Rest... 32 weeks TODAY!!!
It’s been 3 weeks and 3 days since I was placed on bed rest. I thought I would blog about my doctor appts to keep everyone informed. For those of you who don’t know why I am on bed rest I have Pregnancy Induced Hyperion (High Blood Pressure). I know crazy a marathon runner with high blood pressure. It’s even hard for the doctor to wrap his mind around. It just goes to show you it can happen to anyone.
So here is some background this DID not happened out the clear blue, I have been running high since my first appt at 9 weeks. I don’t think anyone was super surprised since I had Alana 6 weeks early due to Pre-Eclampsia. After being monitor very close for a few weeks I was place on medicine for the high blood pressure. It seemed to help in the beginning bringing it down into a more normal range. At my 20 week appt it was getting a little higher but still in a good range, at that point the doctor was more concerned about my lack of weight gain. I was so sick for the first 22 weeks, at my 20 week appt I had only put on a half a pound. The baby looked great to me that’s all that matter. Once we got over the morning sickness I starting putting on weight and looking pregnant. We were back home and in normal life, to be honest life was prefect.
At my 24 week appt my pressure was getting high again, so we upped my meds hoping that would help and it did for a short time. At this point I was seeing the doctor once a week for pressure checks. Things where going fine until my 28 week appt. I started running 160/105 again. I was placed on modified bed rest (6 hours a day of laying my left side) I just stared at him, the really crusher was NO MORE RUNNING. I was heart broken but I would do what ever I had to do to keep this little boy inside me. It didn’t hit me how serious this was until I was driving home. I was in total shock, if we didn’t get this under control my son would be here before he was ready. Thinking I’m super mom I thought I could do it all be on bed rest and take care of our 3 year old. It took John and my mom beating it in me for a few days before I realized that I needed help if I want to carry him longer. So, as many of you know my parents took Alana with them to Dallas for a week so that my mom could get things in order to move in with us until the baby is born. Watching them drive away was the hardest thing I have ever done, sending my daughter away so that my son can stay save inside me. It was a longest week of my life. I’ve NEVER been so happy to see my little girl.
That week at my doctor appt my pressure wasn’t much better, so he started me on steroids to get the baby’s lungs ready for delivery. Here I’m a not even 30 weeks pregnant getting steroid shots so my son lungs are ready. He also moved me from 6 hours a day of bed rest to 8 hours a day and upped my meds. Telling John and I this should get us to 32 weeks. When we walked out of there I was a mess. I did everything I could to hold it together. I walked around with a heavy heart, praying for God to give us more time. I already watched my daughter fight for her life in the beginning I couldn’t do it again with my son. I just couldn’t go through that again. I must have cried a 100 times that weekend. I know people talk about how amazing their husbands are all the time, well mine really is. He is so supportive and understanding. He really helped me get through that ruff patch. Reminding me that I am doing everything I can do to keep him inside me, that many things are working on my side. At the same time understanding why I felt the way I did and reminding me that it was OK, I had every right to be scared. He was just as scared as I was but felt we could get me to 32 weeks. The doctor let me call in my home blood pressure that week, in hopes that would be lower and THEY WHERE!! That meant the bed rest was working. I was getting some really good pressure it was answer to all of our prayers. My baby girl was home, screaming and running around like the crazy princess she is, my pressure where doing great and I was getting spend time with my mom. Life was so good that week. I even went to Circus with Alana and John, it was some well deserved FUN.
The silly, mommy I am I quit taken my pressure at home, afraid they where going up. I liked living in my prefect little Blood pressure world. Well, my fear was right as this past week went on my pressure where going back up. It makes me want to cry right now, they weren’t too bad but slowly getting higher. On Thursday, I got a 153/94 read I knew I the doctor was about to change things up again. If you wondering how I knew, the headaches. They haven’t been bad but the week that we got good reads I didn’t have a single one. Once, I got one I knew it was going up again.
So, on Friday at my now almost 32-week appt YAY!! 32 weeks!! WE MADE IT!! My pressure was 155/94, which for me was OK, not better but not worse. The baby looked GREAT weighting 3 lbs 7 oz, he has chubby checks just like his sister. (The joys of being high risk I get a 3D Ultra sound every visit). The doctor spent quite a bit of time with us, telling us what was ahead. Basically he told us that we have 30% chance of the high blood pressure affecting the baby. That at this point I could go at any time depending on how I’m doing and how Davis is doing. Then he told me the words every mother facing delivery 2 months early needs to hear YOUR BABY WILL BE FINE, if HE IS BORN. That everyday we get past here is gravy for us. The plan of action from here is that I will be seen twice a week to get Non-Stress test on the baby to make sure he is still doing OK. After, we where done talking to the doctor John and I walked to another room where they did the first Non-Stress test on Davis. Let me tell you, he DID not like that at all. He starting kicking the nurse before she could even get me hooked up. I have been telling John that we are in trouble with this little guy he NEVER stops moving, well he showed his daddy, the doctor and nurse that he was in control. He kicked the leads off twice. It’s just what I needed hearing his heart beating and feeling him kick me like crazy. I walked away with a smile as big as Texas on my face. I knew our son, was save in side me for a few more days.
I've had my moments over the last 24 hours that I feel like I could lose it any minute with all the stress. My mom and John keep telling me just feel it, be upset it’s OK. I know that this is in God hands. He knows what is best for Davis. A big pray was answer this week, I am 32 WEEKS today. 3 weeks ago I would have given anything to be here and now I am. My goal now is 34 weeks. I am going to take it 2 weeks at a time. I believe in my heart I can carry this little man until mid-July. As, long as I keep positive and know that it’s going to be 6 weeks of ups and downs.
Please keep us in your prayers, as I said before it’s going to be a lot of ups and downs. I now face that the baby could come at anytime. Lots of people have walked in my shoes before and they carried their babies to term. I pray that I can do that. To be honest I just want to carry him to the end of June.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Alana Hospital Stay:(
Most of you know that Alana was in the hospital this past week but don’t know why. Well, it because she was throwing up blood, yes I said BLOOD. It all started on Tuesday when Alana woke up she was off but couldn’t tell me what was wrong. I went ahead and took her to school but she cried when I left (SHE HAS NEVER DONE THAT BEFORE). After coming home and running, I just couldn’t get her little face when I walked out of her class room off my mind so I jumped in the car and went and got her. As, I walked in she seem OK, her teacher told me that she wasn’t herself. I knew I was right in coming to get her early. She fell asleep in the car on the way home, I moved her to her bed, and about 45 minutes later I heard her crying. I went in to check on her and she said, I need BIG HIGSS and KISS and then turned her head and throw-up all over me the bed, wall, with some even making it across the room. It was VERY VIOLENT. That evening she wasn’t great but never throw-up again not until Wednesday morning around 4:30am. She started crying, when I went in her room. I could see spots of stuff on her sheets and stuff all over face. In my own sleepy state I ask her if she had pooped and she starting crying say NO mommy, then realized it was blood. At first I thought she had a bloody nose and went to get some thing to clean it up, once I got her clean, I laid with her and a few minutes later she started throwing up everywhere. I ran and turn the light on and all I could see is Alana sitting in a pool of blood. I called John who told me to call the doctor. Well, I didn’t have time by the time I got Alana changed and moved to the couch I was cleaning up blood again in the living room. This happened a few more times, before I was able to call John back and tell him that she had done it again. By, now it was close to 7am. He told me to call the doctor (he was trying to figure out what ER he wanted me to take her in the mean time) I was able to get her into the doctor 45 minutes later. From there we went to the local Children’s Hospital where she spent two days on IV fluids. What they think happened is she busted a blood vessel in her esophagus. Which caused her to throw up blood. Her labs came back all out of whack, she was VERY dehydrated. It took a little over 24 hours for Alana to pee, that is how dehydrated she was.
Alana is doing so much better now. She is still sleeping a ton it will take some time for her little body to rebound. She has lost a few pounds, so her clothes are hanging on her, I am sure it will come back over the next few weeks. I pray this NEVER happens again. Every time Alana gets a stomach virus I am going to be on pins and needles.
I have a few pictures of her when she was so sick but they make me sad so I am going just post the ones of her feeling better.
I love this picture!! This is a sign that Cousin Emily and Will made her. my mom helped her hang it in her room. My mom fly out on Wednesday, with John in Residency and on call, I spent Wednesday morning by myself and you could say I was an emotional train wreck. He was able to be with us, that afternoon but not on Thursday. It was a god sent having my mom there. Alana was a bit of handful on Thursday.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
The interviewing is over…. Now the wait begins!!
On Friday, Alana and I picked John up for the 15th time in 2 months from the airport. On Tuesday he left for Canada for his last 2 out of 19 interviews. I am so glad that it’s OVER. It has been a very long two months. We spent most of the time he was gone interviewing in Denver. You could say, Alana and I where lonely we missed John and our friends so much. By the end of March when John left for a 4-day sweep of interviews Alana asked me “Mommy, why can’t we go home?” I said to her that daddy had to work in Denver for a few more days. Her responds was “But Daddy is never home, he keeps going on big trips.” (That is what we called the interviews to her). I just smiled and thought poor baby, she can’t understand why she can’t have her house, friends or daddy. I am grateful that she is so young she won’t remember how little John is around, she will just remember the fun they had when he was. The hardest part of the last two months was when she would get sad and tell me “But mommy, I just miss my house and friends so much.” I would tell her they miss her too. It would break my heart because I missed them just has much as she did. Most, of you know that we have been traveling in and out of El Paso for the last year for John to do away rotations. The longest we came back for was 2 VERY SHORT months. I’m super glad John is done interview but even more glad that we ARE HOME for GOOD!! John will have to go back to Denver next year but we aren’t sure when or for how long. Something I don’t plan to put on my radar until next fall.
We find out about Fellowship in May. We both have prayed and believe that if this is God’s will then, it will happen. We feel it’s in God’s hands now. John has done the best he can. I ask that you pray for John, that no matter what the decision is in May that John finds peace in it. We know that the first year of applying is a long shot.
For those of you who don’t’ know John will start his last year of Residency on July 1st!! Yes, we still have one more year but after 5 years we are taking this year head ON!! Besides, it will be one of the best years of our lives, Davis will join us and complete our family.
